Clementine: Hi.
Joel: I'm sorry?
Clementine: I just said hi.
Joel: Hi. Hello. Hi.
Clementine: Okay if I sit closer? How far are you going?
Joel: Uh, Rockville Center.
Clementine: Get out! Me too! Really? What are the odds?
Joel: Do I know you?
Clementine: Do you ever shop at Barnes & Noble?
Joel: Sure. Sure.
Clementine: That's it!
Joel: Yeah?
Clementine: I've seen you, man! Book slave there for, like, five years now.
Joel: Ah. I would have thought I would've remembered you.
Clementine: Jesus! Is it five years? It might be the hair.
Joel: What might?
Clementine: It changes a lot. The color. That's why you might not recognize me. It's called Blue Ruin, the color.
Joel: Right. Yeah.
Clementine: Snappy name, huh? I like it.
Joel: Yeah.
Clementine: Anyway, this company makes a whole line of colors with equally snappy names. Red... Red Menace, Yellow Fever, Green Revolution. That'd be a job, coming up with those names.
Joel: You think there could possibly be a job like that? I mean, how many hair colors could there be? Fifty, maybe.
Clementine: Someone's got that job. Agent Orange! I came up with that one. I apply my personality in a paste.
Joel: Oh, I doubt that very much.
Clementine: Well, you don't know me, so...you don't know, do you?
Joel: Sorry. I was just...I'm trying to be nice.
Clementine: Yeah. I got it. My name's Clementine, by the way.
Joel: I'm Joel.
Clementine: Hi, Joel.
Joel: Hey.
Clementine: No jokes about my name? Oh, no, you wouldn't do that. You're trying to be nice.
Joel:I don't know any jokes about your name.
Clementine: Huckleberry Hound.
Joel: I don't know what that means.
Clementine: Huckleberry Hound? What are you, nuts?
Joel: It's been suggested.
Clementine: Oh, my darlin', oh, my darlin' Oh, my darlin' Clementine You were lost and gone forever Dreadful sorry Clementine. No?
Joel: I'm sorry. Just...It's a pretty name, though. It really is nice. It's, uh...It means "merciful." Right? Clemency?
Clementine: Although it hardly fits. I'm a vindictive little bitch, truth be told.
Joel: Gee, I wouldn't think that about you.
Clementine: Why wouldn't you think that about me?
Joel: I don't know. I just...I don't know. I just, uh...You seem nice, so...
Clementine: Oh, now I'm nice? Oh, God. Don't you know any other adjectives? I don't need "nice." I don't need myself to be it, and I don't need anybody else to be it at me. Okay.

2 mins...

Clementine: Joel? It's Joel, right?
Joel: Yes.
Clementine: I'm sorry I yelled at you. I'm a little out of sorts today. My embarrassing admission is, I really like that you're nice right now. I mean, I can't tell from one moment to the next what I'm gonna like, but right now...I'm glad you are. I have so much stuff that, uh, I probably should, uh...Oh! I'm sorry.
Joel: Okay.L-I'm writing, and...No, no. I just...
Clementine: Sure. No. That's okay.
Joel: I just have...You know, this is...
Clementine: Okay. Take care, then.

10 mins...

Joel: Hi. I could, uh, give you a ride, if you need. It's cold.
Clementine: Yeah. Okay. Yeah. Yeah? It is frosty. You're not a stalker or anything, right?
Joel: I'm not a stalker. You're the one that talked to me. Remember?
Clementine: That is the oldest trick in the stalker book.
Joel: Really? There's a stalker book?
Clementine: Mm-hmm.
Joel: Okay. I gotta read that one.
Clementine: Look, I'm sorry if I came off sorta nutso. I'm not, really.
Joel: Oh, it's okay. I didn't think you were.
Clementine: Did you wanna have a drink? I have lots of drinks, and I could, um...
Joel: Um...
Clementine: Never mind. Sorry. That was stupid. I'm embarrassed now.
Joel: No, no, no, no.
Clementine: Good night, Joel.

5 mins...

Clementine: Two Blue Ruins.
Joel: Thank you.
Clementine: Drink up, young man. It'll make the whole seduction part less repugnant.
Joel: What?
Clementine: I'm just kidding! Come on. You're kinda closed-mouthed, aren't you?
Joel: I'm sorry. It's just, you know, my life isn't that interesting. I go to work, I come home.
Don't know what to say.
Clementine: You should read my journal. I mean, it's just...blank.
Joel: Really? Does that make you sad or anxious?
Clementine: I mean, I'm always anxious, thinking I'm not living my life to the fullest, taking advantage of every possibility, making sure I'm not wasting one second of the little time I have. I think about that.
Joel: Yeah? You're really nice. Ohh! God, I have to stop saying that.
Clementine: I'm gonna marry you. I know it.
Joel: Um... okay.
Clementine: Joel, you should come up to the Charles with me sometime. It gets frozen this time of year.
Joel: That sounds scary.
Clementine: Exactly. I'll pack a picnic. A night picnic. Night picnics are different. And, um, we could...
Joel: Sounds good. But I...I should, uh, go. Now.
Clementine: You should stay.
Joel: No, I really... I'm... I...I have to get up so early.
Clementine: I would like you to call me. Would you do that? I would like it.
Joel: Yes.
Clementine: Wish me a happy Valentine's Day when you call! That'd be nice.

45 mins...

Clementine: What took you so long?
Joel: I just walked in.
Clementine: Mm-hmm. You miss me?
Joel: Yeah. Oddly enough, I do.